(no subject)
Aug. 14th, 2025 08:38 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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agonyauntDear Care and Feeding,
I’ve got a 14-year-old son and 9-year-old twin daughters. My son lives primarily with his mom, but has always spent plenty of time at my place, and the kids are all quite close. But there is a real problem with how he treats one of his sisters. The two of them share many traits and are quite similar in disposition, and when things are good, they have a very sweet relationship. They’ll go on walks together and chat and laugh the whole time. They also really enjoy play-fighting—e.g., hitting each other with foam swords. But at other times, my son will relentlessly pick at his sister, teasing her for things like not being as good at video games as he is, or questioning her abilities in other ways. It’s unkind, and although she sometimes claps back or does her best to ignore him, more often it sends her into a rage.
I’ve talked to him about it repeatedly (and yelled at him about it), and he has said he has trouble controlling himself. Maybe that sounds like a cop-out, but having observed it so many times, I believe him. It seems like an impulse-control thing, like the comments pop into his head and are out of his mouth before he can stop them. We have a good amount of neurodivergence in our family, and I strongly suspect that, like the sister in question, he’s got ADHD. I’ve wanted to get him assessed, but his mom—with whom I have a good relationship—is resistant, and he hasn’t had any issues in school yet that would offer more reason to push for it. I’ll tell him to knock it off and he’ll be chastened, but then 30 seconds later he’s picking on his sister again. What do you think I should be trying to do here? Yelling obviously isn’t the answer, and I can tell my son is feeling demoralized. I feel like this is about their similar personalities to some extent, because he doesn’t have the same issue with his other sister. But even if that’s the case, I want him to stop cutting his sister down, because she adores him and I’m pretty sure he actually adores her too.
—Bro, Chill
( Read more... )
I’ve got a 14-year-old son and 9-year-old twin daughters. My son lives primarily with his mom, but has always spent plenty of time at my place, and the kids are all quite close. But there is a real problem with how he treats one of his sisters. The two of them share many traits and are quite similar in disposition, and when things are good, they have a very sweet relationship. They’ll go on walks together and chat and laugh the whole time. They also really enjoy play-fighting—e.g., hitting each other with foam swords. But at other times, my son will relentlessly pick at his sister, teasing her for things like not being as good at video games as he is, or questioning her abilities in other ways. It’s unkind, and although she sometimes claps back or does her best to ignore him, more often it sends her into a rage.
I’ve talked to him about it repeatedly (and yelled at him about it), and he has said he has trouble controlling himself. Maybe that sounds like a cop-out, but having observed it so many times, I believe him. It seems like an impulse-control thing, like the comments pop into his head and are out of his mouth before he can stop them. We have a good amount of neurodivergence in our family, and I strongly suspect that, like the sister in question, he’s got ADHD. I’ve wanted to get him assessed, but his mom—with whom I have a good relationship—is resistant, and he hasn’t had any issues in school yet that would offer more reason to push for it. I’ll tell him to knock it off and he’ll be chastened, but then 30 seconds later he’s picking on his sister again. What do you think I should be trying to do here? Yelling obviously isn’t the answer, and I can tell my son is feeling demoralized. I feel like this is about their similar personalities to some extent, because he doesn’t have the same issue with his other sister. But even if that’s the case, I want him to stop cutting his sister down, because she adores him and I’m pretty sure he actually adores her too.
—Bro, Chill
( Read more... )Turnabout is Not Fair Play: Two From Ask a Manager
Aug. 14th, 2025 10:27 amminoanmiss in agonyauntContent advisories: bodily fluids, nudiry, sexual harassment
( CEO being VERY INAPPROPRIATE; bodily fluids )
( Nudity and people should know better )
( CEO being VERY INAPPROPRIATE; bodily fluids )( Nudity and people should know better )
The National Guard in DC
Aug. 13th, 2025 12:10 pmfabrisse in thisfinecrewI no longer live in the District of Columbia. But, in more ways than I can say, the District is home. The District in my opinion (and per my vote in 2016) deserves statehood. I hope in my lifetime to read about the election for the first governor of Douglass Commonwealth.
The President's imposition of martial law -- which is what using military for police functions is -- in the District is made possible by racism. DC is majority-minority. Although the black population is below 50% of the total these days, the white population is still under 40% of the total population of the District.
As a former Advisory Neighborhood Commissioner (an unpaid, non-partisan, local elected position), I can tell you that the crime rate went up during the 2008-10 recession, but was still nowhere near the rates found from 1975-1995. Violent crimes have continued to decrease. Robbery and theft go up when unemployment goes up, but the overall rates are still low. Rarely are tourists affected by any crime, though there was a spate of purse snatchings in the early 2010s.
What Trump and his supporters detest is the fact that most DC police are black. It's a disconnect for them. For too many, black=criminal and white=police. By calling in the National Guard and the other police forces associated with the District (Capitol Police, Metro Police, the US Marshalls, FBI Police...), Trump is attempting to make the optics match his expectations. There are indications that New York City, Los Angeles, Chicago, and Oakland (all of which have minority mayors, all of which are in states whose electoral votes went to his opponents) will probably be next if he gets away with it in DC.
The President also resents that DC's electoral votes have gone to his opponents in all three elections. Even people who loathed Hillary Clinton voted for her in DC because we recognized that she was a fundamentally serious person and our current president is not.
I am asking everyone to call or email their Senators (or Congress people) and object to this blatant misuse of the military. If you can object as a veteran who recognizes that this isn't the military's purview, that's great. If you want to object on Constitutional lines, before DC had home rule, Congress -- mostly the Senate -- had the right of rule over the District of Columbia. Even Republican Senators should be willing to guard their own rights to shape and control the District. That power has never really belonged to the Executive.
For anyone who's interested, DC voted in favor of statehood in a 2016 referendum. Among other items, it gave us the potential future name of Douglass Commonwealth so that we could retain DC for postal services. If you think we're too small, by area to be a state, we're larger than the three smallest countries in the world. If you think we lack population, we have more people than Vermont or Wyoming, and we're within spitting distance of Alaska.
Overall, DC paid income tax of $45,243,625 (in thousands of dollars) in Fiscal 2024. North Dakota, West Virginia, Wyoming, Alaska, Vermont, and Puerto Rico combined paid income tax of $44,810,347 (in thousands of dollars). The District of Columbia deserves a say in how U.S. tax dollars are spent.
Please call your Senators and/or Representative to object to the deployment of the National Guard in DC.
The President's imposition of martial law -- which is what using military for police functions is -- in the District is made possible by racism. DC is majority-minority. Although the black population is below 50% of the total these days, the white population is still under 40% of the total population of the District.
As a former Advisory Neighborhood Commissioner (an unpaid, non-partisan, local elected position), I can tell you that the crime rate went up during the 2008-10 recession, but was still nowhere near the rates found from 1975-1995. Violent crimes have continued to decrease. Robbery and theft go up when unemployment goes up, but the overall rates are still low. Rarely are tourists affected by any crime, though there was a spate of purse snatchings in the early 2010s.
What Trump and his supporters detest is the fact that most DC police are black. It's a disconnect for them. For too many, black=criminal and white=police. By calling in the National Guard and the other police forces associated with the District (Capitol Police, Metro Police, the US Marshalls, FBI Police...), Trump is attempting to make the optics match his expectations. There are indications that New York City, Los Angeles, Chicago, and Oakland (all of which have minority mayors, all of which are in states whose electoral votes went to his opponents) will probably be next if he gets away with it in DC.
The President also resents that DC's electoral votes have gone to his opponents in all three elections. Even people who loathed Hillary Clinton voted for her in DC because we recognized that she was a fundamentally serious person and our current president is not.
I am asking everyone to call or email their Senators (or Congress people) and object to this blatant misuse of the military. If you can object as a veteran who recognizes that this isn't the military's purview, that's great. If you want to object on Constitutional lines, before DC had home rule, Congress -- mostly the Senate -- had the right of rule over the District of Columbia. Even Republican Senators should be willing to guard their own rights to shape and control the District. That power has never really belonged to the Executive.
For anyone who's interested, DC voted in favor of statehood in a 2016 referendum. Among other items, it gave us the potential future name of Douglass Commonwealth so that we could retain DC for postal services. If you think we're too small, by area to be a state, we're larger than the three smallest countries in the world. If you think we lack population, we have more people than Vermont or Wyoming, and we're within spitting distance of Alaska.
Overall, DC paid income tax of $45,243,625 (in thousands of dollars) in Fiscal 2024. North Dakota, West Virginia, Wyoming, Alaska, Vermont, and Puerto Rico combined paid income tax of $44,810,347 (in thousands of dollars). The District of Columbia deserves a say in how U.S. tax dollars are spent.
Please call your Senators and/or Representative to object to the deployment of the National Guard in DC.
More mostly useless advice!
Aug. 12th, 2025 11:54 amconuly in agonyauntDEAR HARRIETTE: As parents, I'm sure most of us have experienced a squabble or disagreement between our kids. I definitely have, but they're usually short-lived. Currently, two of my girls aren't speaking and haven't been for a few months. This all started because my older daughter made a joke about me owing her back pay because my younger daughter's college tuition was more expensive than hers. My younger daughter, who is usually quite docile, blew up at the comment. She called her older sister ungrateful, rude and spoiled. They argued like I've never seen before, and they haven't spoken since. I tried talking to my younger daughter about it, but she won't apologize. I don't think her sentiments were wrong; the joke was in poor taste. I think as a family we should never be so hostile toward each other. How do I get my girls back on track? -- Family Disagreement
( Read more... )
( Read more... )Harriette's advice here isn't bad, per se, it's just aggressively useless
Aug. 12th, 2025 04:46 amconuly in agonyauntDEAR HARRIETTE: Over the years, my mom and I have struggled to forge the ideal smooth-sailing mother-daughter bond that other people have. We used to bump heads a lot. Now that we no longer bump heads, we just have a hard time connecting and enjoying each other. I want things to get better, but she often compares my relationship with her to the one I have with my dad. My dad and I are pretty playful together, and he's easy to talk to. I think my mom constantly mocking the dynamic I have with my dad is her version of banter or "breaking the ice," but I wish she would stop comparing so that she and I could find our own groove. How do I get her on the same page as me? -- Mommy Issues
( Read more... )
( Read more... )Wow, these people....
Aug. 10th, 2025 06:39 pmconuly in agonyaunt1. DEAR ABBY: My son is 20 and a senior in college. He's a baseball player and is about to ask the girl he's been dating for a year and a half to marry him. My wife and I don't get along with her at all. She has a myriad of health problems and takes eight prescriptions a day. Because of her conditions, she rarely has the energy to do anything but lie around when she comes to our house. She used to have a job packing groceries at a market, and she would frequently log 10 to 12 miles a day walking. She quit that job for a job at an ice cream shop where she does little walking.
We had a get-together at my other son's house, and she said she couldn't come because she was too tired. My wife sent my son a message saying, "Really? From scooping ice cream?" The girlfriend needed to use my son's phone and saw the message. Her feelings were hurt, and now she will have nothing to do with us. (They still expect us to pay for their wedding, and for gas and maintenance on his car to visit her parents almost daily.) We want to support our son, but we are over it with her. There is so much more I could tell you. Please help. -- DAD WHO'S OVER IT
( Read more... )
**************
2. Dear Eric: My wife of 50 years told me that she no longer wants to live with me. I am currently living in our summer home with no friends or social contacts/networks. She has no interest in reconciling.
We didn't fight or argue, and I am at a loss as to what triggered her declaration. This has taken me totally by surprise. I thought we had a good marriage, with occasional ups and downs. There are no abuse, addiction or infidelity issues. I worked my whole life and am now retired. As soon as we had children, she was able to stay at home and lived comfortably raising our children and taking care of the household. The children have sided with their mom and won't speak to me. I think she has poisoned them against me, but don't see the gain in her doing that.
I am miserable. I am 74 with neurological mobility issues. I fear that I will fall, and no one will be around. Senior housing for me is too expensive and will deplete our planned retirement resources. We were counting on eventually selling our summer home to supplement our finances later in life. This is no longer possible as I am living in that house. This is not how I wanted the last chapters of my life to end.
I have had five sessions of therapy with no results. My therapist says I'm not at risk to myself or others and I am perpetually slightly depressed but not debilitated. Without more concrete information, he cannot help me. I am not a bad person, yet here I am.
– Totally Betrayed
( Read more... )
************
3. DEAR ABBY: Our 23-year-old son, "Ed," was clean-cut, into working out and staying healthy, watched his diet -- he even joined a gym and was going every week. Ed has been dating a girl, "Emily," who is the complete opposite. She's probably a hundred pounds overweight. She's also dirty, (when she comes here, there have been days she doesn't take a shower).
Twice I have found Emily's lingerie on the floor. Last week, she left a pair of her panties on the bathroom floor. I showed Ed and told him that was the SECOND time I had found her underwear (the first time I didn't say anything). I said, "You have to talk to Emily and tell her not to leave her underwear laying around."
I see a change in Ed. My son hasn't cut his hair in 2 1/2 years and he no longer appears to be as into working out. This is not who we are as a family. My husband and I are fit for our ages (60s) and by all standards clean and orderly. Should I say anything to Ed? I feel like Emily is changing who he is. -- NOT THE SAME IN THE EAST
( Read more... )
**********
4. DEAR ABBY: Our 40-year-old son has become a full-fledged narcissist and blames us (his sister, her husband, my husband and me) for a family schism that has gone on for two years. He tells lies about us and keeps us from our granddaughter. Any attempt to contact him has been met with venomous, foul-mouthed texts in return.
Our son went through a nasty divorce and horrible custody proceeding, but we did our best to support him financially and emotionally during that time. He is now supposedly happily remarried, but he continues to deny us access to his daughter. We are heartbroken. This is not the way we raised him. Any suggestions? -- BAFFLED IN NORTH CAROLINA
( Read more... )
******
5. DEAR HARRIETTE: My husband and I recently planned a weekend trip out of town, and we arranged for our children to stay with their aunt, my husband's sister, while we were away. We thought everything was going well until, halfway through our trip, we received a call from her saying that one of our kids had started acting out. She told us that she doesn't tolerate that kind of behavior in her home and insisted that we come pick him up immediately. I was shocked and honestly upset. I understand that our son can be a handful at times. He's going through a bit of a rebellious phase, but I feel like she overreacted. We trusted her to help us out, and instead of trying to manage the situation or even calling us for advice on how to calm him down, she made us cut our trip short and made us feel like we were being irresponsible parents for going away in the first place. Now there's tension between us, and I don't know how to approach this. Am I wrong for feeling like she could have handled things differently? -- Not Helpful
( Read more... )
We had a get-together at my other son's house, and she said she couldn't come because she was too tired. My wife sent my son a message saying, "Really? From scooping ice cream?" The girlfriend needed to use my son's phone and saw the message. Her feelings were hurt, and now she will have nothing to do with us. (They still expect us to pay for their wedding, and for gas and maintenance on his car to visit her parents almost daily.) We want to support our son, but we are over it with her. There is so much more I could tell you. Please help. -- DAD WHO'S OVER IT
( Read more... )2. Dear Eric: My wife of 50 years told me that she no longer wants to live with me. I am currently living in our summer home with no friends or social contacts/networks. She has no interest in reconciling.
We didn't fight or argue, and I am at a loss as to what triggered her declaration. This has taken me totally by surprise. I thought we had a good marriage, with occasional ups and downs. There are no abuse, addiction or infidelity issues. I worked my whole life and am now retired. As soon as we had children, she was able to stay at home and lived comfortably raising our children and taking care of the household. The children have sided with their mom and won't speak to me. I think she has poisoned them against me, but don't see the gain in her doing that.
I am miserable. I am 74 with neurological mobility issues. I fear that I will fall, and no one will be around. Senior housing for me is too expensive and will deplete our planned retirement resources. We were counting on eventually selling our summer home to supplement our finances later in life. This is no longer possible as I am living in that house. This is not how I wanted the last chapters of my life to end.
I have had five sessions of therapy with no results. My therapist says I'm not at risk to myself or others and I am perpetually slightly depressed but not debilitated. Without more concrete information, he cannot help me. I am not a bad person, yet here I am.
– Totally Betrayed
( Read more... )3. DEAR ABBY: Our 23-year-old son, "Ed," was clean-cut, into working out and staying healthy, watched his diet -- he even joined a gym and was going every week. Ed has been dating a girl, "Emily," who is the complete opposite. She's probably a hundred pounds overweight. She's also dirty, (when she comes here, there have been days she doesn't take a shower).
Twice I have found Emily's lingerie on the floor. Last week, she left a pair of her panties on the bathroom floor. I showed Ed and told him that was the SECOND time I had found her underwear (the first time I didn't say anything). I said, "You have to talk to Emily and tell her not to leave her underwear laying around."
I see a change in Ed. My son hasn't cut his hair in 2 1/2 years and he no longer appears to be as into working out. This is not who we are as a family. My husband and I are fit for our ages (60s) and by all standards clean and orderly. Should I say anything to Ed? I feel like Emily is changing who he is. -- NOT THE SAME IN THE EAST
( Read more... )4. DEAR ABBY: Our 40-year-old son has become a full-fledged narcissist and blames us (his sister, her husband, my husband and me) for a family schism that has gone on for two years. He tells lies about us and keeps us from our granddaughter. Any attempt to contact him has been met with venomous, foul-mouthed texts in return.
Our son went through a nasty divorce and horrible custody proceeding, but we did our best to support him financially and emotionally during that time. He is now supposedly happily remarried, but he continues to deny us access to his daughter. We are heartbroken. This is not the way we raised him. Any suggestions? -- BAFFLED IN NORTH CAROLINA
( Read more... )5. DEAR HARRIETTE: My husband and I recently planned a weekend trip out of town, and we arranged for our children to stay with their aunt, my husband's sister, while we were away. We thought everything was going well until, halfway through our trip, we received a call from her saying that one of our kids had started acting out. She told us that she doesn't tolerate that kind of behavior in her home and insisted that we come pick him up immediately. I was shocked and honestly upset. I understand that our son can be a handful at times. He's going through a bit of a rebellious phase, but I feel like she overreacted. We trusted her to help us out, and instead of trying to manage the situation or even calling us for advice on how to calm him down, she made us cut our trip short and made us feel like we were being irresponsible parents for going away in the first place. Now there's tension between us, and I don't know how to approach this. Am I wrong for feeling like she could have handled things differently? -- Not Helpful
( Read more... )Surprisingly good advice from Annie, I want to save it for posterity
Aug. 10th, 2025 12:47 pmconuly in agonyauntDear Annie: My sister "Kendra" and I are not very close and only communicate two to three times per year, mainly in emails. Kendra sold her home and moved out of state. Through our sibling, I heard that she listed her house high to begin with and had to come down on her price in the end but made a decent amount on it. I never commented on how much she made or didn't make on her old house; I felt that was absolutely none of my business. When she moved and posted pictures of her new house, I commented that I was happy for her.
Fast-forward to me selling my home a year or so later. After my home sold, the information on it went out to the various housing sites, incorrectly showing that it took a loss. We actually did make a nice profit on it. The information that went out was a typo and was corrected about four weeks later.
Kendra was quick to reach out in an email stating she saw online how much we sold for and was surprised at the extreme money loss we took. She then asked if it was a short sale or foreclosure and commented that we must have been very upset about it.
I feel this was none of her business, even if it was the right information. Am I overreacting that I feel it was quite rude for her to comment on my personal business? How should I reply back to her? -- Perplexed
( Read more... )
Fast-forward to me selling my home a year or so later. After my home sold, the information on it went out to the various housing sites, incorrectly showing that it took a loss. We actually did make a nice profit on it. The information that went out was a typo and was corrected about four weeks later.
Kendra was quick to reach out in an email stating she saw online how much we sold for and was surprised at the extreme money loss we took. She then asked if it was a short sale or foreclosure and commented that we must have been very upset about it.
I feel this was none of her business, even if it was the right information. Am I overreacting that I feel it was quite rude for her to comment on my personal business? How should I reply back to her? -- Perplexed
( Read more... )(no subject)
Aug. 10th, 2025 12:18 pmconuly in agonyauntDEAR HARRIETTE: Since I was young, I've found that I've always had strange anxiety-induced habits -- pulling at the edges of my hair, sucking my thumb, picking at scabs, etc. Over time, I'd find a solution, or I'd just sort of grow out of it. At present, I scratch the insides of my palms when I'm nervous, stressed or frustrated. I think I may do it at other times, but I haven't pinpointed all of the triggers. Lately, it's been out of control. I haven't been able to resolve this one, but I'm so ready to leave it behind. How do I find a lifetime solution for all these behavioral tics? -- Old Habits Die Hard
( Read more... )
( Read more... )(no subject)
Aug. 9th, 2025 08:47 pmconuly in agonyauntMy mother desperately wants grandchildren. I’m nearing 30 and have never wanted children; my partner feels the same way. We would both rather focus on our careers, and there are also some hereditary health conditions in our family — nothing life-threatening, but enough that we would rather not pass them on.
Despite knowing all this, my mother pressures us constantly. Every time I explain my position, she becomes distraught and insists I just don’t understand the joy a child would bring. She’s in poor physical and mental health, and these conversations quickly spiral into intense emotional distress. Any attempts at therapy have been flatly dismissed.
Now she’s saying that she’ll cut me out of her will if I don’t have a child. There’s not much money involved, but I worry that, if it comes to that, she might also cut off contact altogether. My sibling has already severed ties with my mother over her mental-health struggles. I want to keep my mother in my life, but I can’t stand the thought of this one issue dominating whatever time we have left together.
I’ve started to consider telling her I can’t have children because of fertility issues. That would be a lie, and I feel uneasy using something so many people genuinely struggle with as an excuse. Still, her fixation on grandchildren is seriously damaging our relationship. Should I lie to my mother to try to save our relationship, or keep telling the truth and watch things fall apart? — Name Withheld
( Read more... )
Despite knowing all this, my mother pressures us constantly. Every time I explain my position, she becomes distraught and insists I just don’t understand the joy a child would bring. She’s in poor physical and mental health, and these conversations quickly spiral into intense emotional distress. Any attempts at therapy have been flatly dismissed.
Now she’s saying that she’ll cut me out of her will if I don’t have a child. There’s not much money involved, but I worry that, if it comes to that, she might also cut off contact altogether. My sibling has already severed ties with my mother over her mental-health struggles. I want to keep my mother in my life, but I can’t stand the thought of this one issue dominating whatever time we have left together.
I’ve started to consider telling her I can’t have children because of fertility issues. That would be a lie, and I feel uneasy using something so many people genuinely struggle with as an excuse. Still, her fixation on grandchildren is seriously damaging our relationship. Should I lie to my mother to try to save our relationship, or keep telling the truth and watch things fall apart? — Name Withheld
( Read more... )call RFK Jr. about vaccine access
Aug. 7th, 2025 09:27 amredbird in thisfinecrewIf anyone wants to call RFK Jr. to complain about him not funding vaccines, the phone number is 202-690-7000. I called during office hours (8:30-5 Eastern time) and got voicemail. The message asked for a phone number, and claimed someone would call me back.
If anyone wants a script, my message was:
My name is Vicki Rosenzweig. I’m calling from Boston, to demand that the secretary restore funding for MRNA vaccines. He must make the fall covid and flu boosters available to everyone. I’m immune-compromised, and my safety depends on my family being vaccinated and not giving me a virus. My phone number is [your number here]
Edit as appropriate.
If anyone wants a script, my message was:
My name is Vicki Rosenzweig. I’m calling from Boston, to demand that the secretary restore funding for MRNA vaccines. He must make the fall covid and flu boosters available to everyone. I’m immune-compromised, and my safety depends on my family being vaccinated and not giving me a virus. My phone number is [your number here]
Edit as appropriate.
Massachusetts Universal Voting Restoration
Aug. 6th, 2025 01:09 pmhermionesviolin in thisfinecrewFor anyone registered to vote in Massachusetts -- you can sign up to get reminded when it's time to officially sign papers to put on the Massachusetts ballot a measure to repeal the Massachusetts constitutional amendment that took the right to vote away from people serving felony sentences.
From an email from Progressive Mass:
From an email from Progressive Mass:
Unlock Democracy in Massachusetts
In 2000, Massachusetts passed a constitutional amendment that took away voting rights from people incarcerated for a felony conviction. This stripping of rights was in response to political organizing happening in prison. The Empowering Descendant Communities to Unlock Democracy project and allies aim to get voting rights restoration on the statewide ballot. If you are a registered voter in Massachusetts, please take a minute to fill out our pledge form now: https://tinyurl.com/uvrpledge. Once the Attorney General approves the language, organizers will reach out to those who filled out the pledge with dates/locations for nearby signature collection efforts.
The EDC to Unlock Democracy is is committed to ensuring that democracy does not stop at prisons and jails in Massachusetts. It is a collaborative project between the Democracy Behind Bars Coalition, the African American Coalition Committee at MCI-Norfolk, Healing our Land, Inc., and more. To get in touch email EDCtoUnlockDemocracyMA@gmail.com.
July check-in post
Aug. 5th, 2025 10:08 amredbird in thisfinecrewJuly was a quieter month on the community, with four posts:
On July 17,gingicat posted about virtual Good Trouble Lives on rallies.
On July 22,executrix post about a Womens March program on feminism and fan culture.
Also on July 22,gingicat warned about apparent voter registration shenanigans and linked to a place to check your registration.
On July 30, I posted about a call for public comments about gender-affirming care.
Thanks to everyone who posted.
Here's a poll to tell us what you've been doing:
As always, everyone is free to make posts about any issues and actions they think the comm should know about. You can also drop some information into a comment to our sticky post if you'd like the mods to do it.
If you're looking for information on anything else, you can use our tags to check for any ongoing actions or resources relevant to the issues you care about. I try to keep the tag list up-to-date. If you need a tag added, you can DM me.
On July 17,
gingicat posted about virtual Good Trouble Lives on rallies.On July 22,
executrix post about a Womens March program on feminism and fan culture.Also on July 22,
gingicat warned about apparent voter registration shenanigans and linked to a place to check your registration.On July 30, I posted about a call for public comments about gender-affirming care.
Thanks to everyone who posted.
Here's a poll to tell us what you've been doing:
Open to: Registered Users, detailed results viewable to: All, participants: 17
Since the last check-in, I....
View Answers
called one of my senators
4 (23.5%)
called my other senator
4 (23.5%)
called my congressmember
4 (23.5%)
called my governor
1 (5.9%)
called my mayor, state rep, or other local official
1 (5.9%)
did get-out-the-vote work, such as postcarding or phone banking
0 (0.0%)
voted
1 (5.9%)
sent a postcard/email/letter/fax to a government official or agency
6 (35.3%)
went to a protest
4 (23.5%)
attended an in-person activist group
3 (17.6%)
went to a town hall
0 (0.0%)
participated in phone or online training
3 (17.6%)
donated money to a cause
10 (58.8%)
worked for a campaign
1 (5.9%)
did textbanking or phonebanking
0 (0.0%)
took care of myself
10 (58.8%)
not a US citizen, but worked in solidarity in my community
2 (11.8%)
did something else (tell us about it in comments)
4 (23.5%)
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Ask a Manager: Two From The Same Column
Aug. 5th, 2025 12:21 amminoanmiss in agonyauntCompare and Contrast.
( Employee's Husband Sent Us Revenge Porn )
( 4. Delivery person uses our lunchroom )
( Employee's Husband Sent Us Revenge Porn )( 4. Delivery person uses our lunchroom )(no subject)
Aug. 4th, 2025 10:06 amconuly in agonyauntDear Carolyn: A friend and colleague has been MIA at work and in our friend circle for weeks. She claims she hurt her back, is in pain and having procedures and and and… And this has her missing meetings and deadlines and happy hour and dropping all the balls. She has not told anyone exactly what happened with her back. She said she was doing some light housework when it just hurt all of a sudden, which sounds ridiculous to me and everyone else I know. We don’t know what “procedures” she has had. We don’t know when she will get back to normal. We’re not talking about an old person here; she is 43! I called her the other day and I could hear the TV on, during the workday, which she turned off or muted when she took my call.
I feel like she is lying or exaggerating to get out of work — while not taking formal leave or PTO, because we can work remotely — and she is blowing off her friends and colleagues while we pick up the slack for her at the office and make her excuses at social functions. How do I figure out what’s really going on with her, and get her to do her own work again so I don’t have to fill in for someone who is home watching TV while I’m busting my you-know-what?
— Busting My You-Know-What
( Read more... )
I feel like she is lying or exaggerating to get out of work — while not taking formal leave or PTO, because we can work remotely — and she is blowing off her friends and colleagues while we pick up the slack for her at the office and make her excuses at social functions. How do I figure out what’s really going on with her, and get her to do her own work again so I don’t have to fill in for someone who is home watching TV while I’m busting my you-know-what?
— Busting My You-Know-What
( Read more... )
